Updated: Feb 25
Someone asked me how you can be vulnerable yet not fragile and break down in the middle of a work day? How do you allow yourself to be vulnerable but still remain somewhat contained?
Being vulnerable doesn't mean that you allow your emotions to control you. Being vulnerable means allowing yourself to feel what you are feeling and staying present within that. Being truly vulnerable doesn't mean that you go unconscious and become reactive to the world outside of yourself.
Being vulnerable means allowing yourself to feel what you are feeling and coming to a place of self-knowing within that. That also means that sometimes you do allow yourself to be very fragile and allow yourself to express your own needs. But to become aware of our own needs, our true needs, we need to listen within.
When we do our own inner work, we learn to take responsibility for how we feel. Thus we don't put the responsibility of our feelings on someone else's table. Yet we can communicate how the behaviors of others might make us feel and if certain relationships don't change or evolve even if we communicate our needs then we can choose to walk away.
But in the end we always have to go back to ourselves and sit with what we are feeling. We have to allow other people to be yet we have to also be responsible for ourselves. So we can have conversations with someone expressing how their behavior makes us feel yet if they are unable to change their behavior, then we have to take responsibility for our own life and maybe choose to walk away from the situation and the relationship.