Redefining My Self Through My Mind

The lines of self are blurred and becoming more blurred by the moment. I've lost myself so many times these last years.

Who I am isn't defined anymore.

Who I am becoming isn't known either.

It scares me.

That I am not sure who I am becoming, but underneath it all I also understand myself more than I have ever have.

The other night I was going to sleep and I felt myself being pulled into the quantum field. Into the oneness and I thought I was dying, or rather I thought I was leaving my physical body permanently at that moment so I held on to my body until I was back again and then I slipped away into sleep.

I find it funny how scared I am of "losing" this identity, this embodiment, yet I'm not sure what I'm holding onto anymore?

The stories of who I am are slipping away from me yet I'm holding on to something not fully ready to let go.

The longing to be without form and yet this deep attachm