I've been sometimes hesitant about sharing my experiences with plant medicines since I've been afraid that it would undermine my credibility as a healer and the gift that I received without any 'help' other than meditating. But since working at the Ayahuasca retreat centre here in Peru I've realized that it doesn't really matter how you come to awaken or how you receive your gift of healing (we all possess the gift of healing, most of us have just forgot how to..). The point is that its there and that I do have the capability to help others, both through my healing sessions and through spiritual guidance.
Ayahuasca has been the most powerful healer I've come across in this realm, she is (the spirit of the plant is very feminine) mindblowingly powerful. Assisting others that come to the centre for healing has been greatly rewarding for me, most of the guests have experienced oneness and unconditional love to all that Is. Absolutely beautiful to watch and I'm grateful for the existence of the plant medicines that the Earth provide for us for just this reason.
If you ask the shamans here, they say that Ayahuasca is not about the visions or the journeys, but that she's a healer of the body. She enters into your system and unless you're physical system is clean she will simply detox you and that's a detox in all sense of the words. The detox can be very uncomfortable both physically and mentally, bringing up everything that we hold within that doesn't serve us.
Bringing us closer to our true state of light and love. For me personally the initial ceremonies were very confusing and very gentle. The first ceremony she told me that I had nothing to learn from her, that I should go back to the man I thought I was in love with and have babies. This was my first two ceremonies, very confusing since I felt called to work with Ayahuasca for over two years and I had abandoned the thought of being with this man for many reasons.
In the third ceremony she told me I had to empty my cup so that she could fill it, which also was confusing because Hey! I was there wasn't I? How more open to receive healing could I be? Then she explained that no I have nothing to learn, I just need to remember… In the end of the third ceremony I had a huge emotional release and a huge purge of so much stuff that wasn't very nice..
Afterwards I also spoke to the man that I thought I was in love with and got forcefully rejected which was initially a very hurtful experience. Now looking back I'm grateful because I now realize that I deserve much more love than he is capable of giving me and that I deserve to be really really loved for who I am. That its not just about how much I can love another but also about how much I can love and honour myself through the union with another and which is a choice that I myself make.
On the fourth ceremony I received a 'lion' implant into my brain and after that the ceremonies shifted, I started receiving memories of living on other planets, specifically on Andromeda and I also started singing songs and speaking languages that I didn't know I could speak and songs that I didn't know existed. Well I've had memories of being in different realms before but that has always felt more like a dream than an actual experience.
Both the languages and the songs have been of a very different nature, I have never heard anything like this in this realm before. The use of tone and the flow of the languages and the songs are definitely out of this world, which can be confirmed by the other people in the ceremonies, I hope at one time to record them because I perceive them as very healing vibrational tones. I also believe that I will eventually work much more with singing and tones in my healing work.
I've never seen myself as a star seed, though others have told me I come from higher realms and that I know I'm here for the healing of this planet. But I also know that since there is no time, and everything is happening in the now, including all 'past', 'future' lifetimes and existences. This is the lifetime that matters as this is the life I'm currently experiencing, well that's what I thought.. So in the continuing ceremonies with Ayahuasca, I continued having these memories and downloads of being a Godlike limitless multidimensional being with catlike features from another dimension, a being that could and would shape shift in to anything and everything with just the intention of wanting to do just that.
I've never felt so confident in my own skin since having these experiences, this alternate personality of me or this multidimensional being that is very much Me. I'm not totally clear on all reasons why I'm receiving this information or these 'memories' at this point but the foremost reason as I mentioned is so that I can understand all that I AM but also all that I can BE to have the confidence in the work that I'm here to do and also to understand the purpose to why I'm here and why I never felt at home here on this planet. I've always felt different and more than a little out of place on here.
I will share more about the downloads and the impressions I've received, during one of the most intense ceremonies I also witnessed the Shift of this planet to a much higher vibrational state of being and how that came to be. This is the reason why I am here, why I choose to come to this realm and this planet, but I will speak more about this in later posts..
I would also apologize to you if you have contacted me in the recent months without receiving a response, its been hard for me to function mentally in this realm at times, I've just been in-between worlds between the ceremonies and even speaking with my family about mundane things has been a task at times. I realize that I need to honour myself by actually going into actual retreat when I'm working with the plant medicines and giving me the time and space for my own healing and restructuring of being without the need to heal or nurture anyone else but myself. My entire system and especially my brain has had what I perceive to be a complete overhaul yet I also feel that I've just begun this intense journey...
But for now I'm finally back in my physical body and feel better than I've ever felt and also feeling very excited about my healing work again so if you haven't received a response yet or within the next 24 hours or so please contact me again. Thank you again for your patience!
Much Love to you and yours, always! Kristina